Today is one of those days where I wish you’d show up with news that you’re getting help, an apology, and a looooooooooong hug.
In spite of the hell you’ve put me through, and in spite of the fact that I know you’re sick but also chose to hurt me on purpose, and in spite of the fact that you are driven by your overwhelming emotions and behavioral patterns , in spite of all that- the sick part, the wicked part, whatever part,
I MISS THE LIVING HELL OUT OF YOU.
And boy does it hurt.
Damn it all to hell…
What kind of life is this? Pain and fear, salted and peppered with sadness? I don’t know what kind of life it is other than awful but yeah- THAT is my life and in spite of my best efforts I don’t see a way out of this.
Damn.