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i gave up my virginity to my boyfriend about two weeks ago. we broke up because he was telling his exgirlfriend who he told me he wasnt talking to anymore that he still wanted to be with her. after he told her that he had sex with me again.

i feel very dirty and used. i gave up the one thing i held onto and felt was sacred. and now he doesnt even talk to me. and he’s gotten back with his girlfriend.

sometimes i think about killing them. seperatly so they dont even know the other is dead until i tell them. but usually the anger subsides and i just feel like i need to kill myself instead.