I finally got what i spent so long wishing about. What i spent so many tears, and sleepless nights, and hours feeling guilty at what little work i was doing. I finally got it. And i couldnt be happier. But im STILL not motivated enough to work through it, till the end. I just cant find the energy to work my best at it. I think its because im scared that i wont be as great at it as i have always wanted to be, or as great and natural at it as everyone expects me to be.
Maybe i should stop worrying about all this and just TRY.
But.…I dont know if i can.